Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Work, Damn You

Tell me, are you happy being a writer?

Are you, by chance, in it for the opportunity to tell people you are a writer and thereby appear mysterious and intriguing to them?

Do you imagine great writers are found the same way great actors are found, stopped by some movie director in a coffee shop who forces his or her card into said actor's palm with super-exclusive cell phone numbers scribbled on the back and claims said actor is just what he needs for the movie he's starting and please drop the boring life and be on location by 6 am the next morning?

Is an editor haunting your town with the 2010 version of Manuscript Detector hidden in the back of a utility van, holding oversized earphones to her head, waiting for that 'ping' that will tell her that somewhere in your house is the Cinderella of all writers just waitiing to be discovered, locked up in the attic with only a pen and paper to keep her company and no singing mice in sight, and therefore forced to write amazing stories of literary genius for a little escapism?


I'm telling you now that if you are Cinderella look around.
Those singing mice are somewhere. And the story about you is much more interesting (which is not saying much) than the story you wrote and you should stick with playing princess and leave the writing to the people who...


To those of you whose talents have been discovered by an agent or editor while sipping your Starbucks and typing with one finger, or discovered because Aunt Serina knew someone who knew someone who owed her a favor, the rest of us have a message for you.

Miss on you, Pister.

Remember: Luck without Work is DUMB luck.
Work rewarded with Luck is Karma.

And to my friends who have recently been so rewarded with agent contracts, I dance the Evan Almighty Dance in your honor. Don't watch, it's not pretty.



Melissa Mayhue said...

Though you never fail to crack me up, my friend, your words are oh, so true! And even if you get the Cinderella version [or the editor with that amazing detector], the hard work doesn't end there... it's only the beginning. So all the hard work up to that point? It's just getting you in shape!!!

Hey, I'll join you in that dance since nobody is looking. My dancing leaves a lot to be desired too!

~ Melissa

Tiff said...

Loved this! I say that while sitting in a Starbucks, hiding from my family, sipping a green tea frappuccino, and writing like made. Afer all, I just landed the best agent. You're next, my friend. :)


stanalei said...

Dance, Miss Ainsley. And dance some more. The fruit of your labor is nigh. May 2010 be the year of your call!


Ainsley said...

Oh Melissa,
Yours was not a Cinderella Story, yours was Karma's reward for writing an excellent (and Scottish) story!

Having a great network of contacts, i.e. Sue G, takes a bit of work, too. Donut?


Cindy said...

OMG....I LOVE THIS BLOG! Leslie, my love, you're brilliant!


Cindy Nord